14 years passed and I'm still going insane.
14 years passed and I had not found the uttermost love yet.
14 years passed and I grew physically , mentally and spiritually.
14 years passed and how many more years will there be for me?
2 more years and I'll be gone from this school for good. Ain't time going a little bit too fast?
I was once a newbie in 2007 and now it's 2009. Form 3 for goodness sake, form 3...
I once thought that Form 3 would never come. However, in reality, it did.
I remember the first day of orientation, the time when I first step few meters from the hall.
She approached me, said something chinese and smiled. Soon after, I found myself to be in the hall will all those other chinese student, which was kind of awkward for me ( I had never been into a crowd of chinese people before, except for my family of course) .
Then, there were these Ajks (I took quite awhile to understand this term). I remembered one guy, who was a muda. Man... did he make me think. Sadly, like, what they said, bonds start to loosen after orientation, starting from day 1.
The days passed and questions like 'How does it feel like being an ajk?' and ' Will I be like that one day?' continued to haunt my tight little brain of mine, consuming every little space there is.
Now, after all those years, I actually found the answers to my own question.
Sadly, more questions start to pop up and as people grow, we'll be more or less sensitive to every tiny bit of particle around us. Filled with sorrow and despair, I continue to crave for the answers. How annoying it is, killing me every second of my life, draining my blood slowly till the very last drop. Worries start to rise too. Everything, completely everything, has something for me to think about. Why this? Why me? I don't want this to happen... no way!!! I can't control myself anymore. Sick of living...
I pray, that I continue to live. Oh please have mercy Lord... have mercy. Save me from all evil and guide me along the road of nails and vipers...
